An NBA All-Star Game RTOE
By Ian Levy
Last night the All-Star reserves were announced, and so we had to talk about it. Of course, the first two questions are not really relevant since Boogie got added to the team this afternoon, but that’s a good thing in our opinion.
1. No Boogie Cousins?!? What is this world coming to?
Jack (@jackhaveitall):
This is messed up, man, this is so messed up. They have to stop passing over Boogie for these teams.
Eric (@EricBuenning):
Man. If Mike Malone is still the coach, Boogie gets in for sure. I just…I feel bad.
Wes (@wcgoldberg):
This might we when Boogie’s on-court antics really hurt him. Coaches don’t like that stuff, and they may have held it against him in the voting process. But really what it comes down to is that the West is so deep and the Kings aren’t very good.
Jan 13, 2015; Sacramento, CA, USA; Sacramento Kings center DeMarcus Cousins (15) reacts to a call during the second quarter of the game against the Dallas Mavericks at Sleep Train Arena. Mandatory Credit: Ed Szczepanski-USA TODAY Sports
Zach (@ZachOliverNBA):
All I know is the world is a dark, dark place where Boogie isn’t an All-Star and this just isn’t right. I want to boycott this. Can we do something about this? Make Obama put him in there? Let’s make it happen.
Ian (@IanDougherty):
Everything is awful. I hate this. I need Point Boogie in this All-Star game. Maybe he can get in as a substitute for an injured Kobe Bryant. {Ed. note: Look at Ianstradamus}
Over/under 25/15 averages for Boogie the rest of the season on his revenge tour?
Jack:
Over, most likely. I’m thinking he has at least three or four just absolutely monster nights where he drops 30+ points and hauls in 15-20 rebounds.
Eric:
I want to take the over here, but I think we get #SadBoogie for a minute. I mean, he’ll still put up 20/10 because he’s absurd, but I predict no revenge tour. I am sad.
Wes:
If Boogie got any more upset on the court he would turn into the Hulk, rip off his jersey Josh McRoberts style, jump through the ceiling of the Sleep Train Arena and kareen through the Sacramento Valley, destroying cattle ranches. Does that answer your question?
Zach:
I think that he could have a big run now. I don’t know about that big, but, he’s going to go out there, just like Damian Lillard, and try to prove he should be there. I hope we get more angry, dunking on Mason Plumlee Boogie.
Ian:
A wise man once said “Stunt on me once and I‘ll flex on you forever.” I imagine Boogie will take these words to heart, and destroy worlds following All-Star weekend. Give me the over.
Who didn’t get in that, regardless of deservedness, you wish had gotten in?
Jan 28, 2015; Houston, TX, USA; Dallas Mavericks guard Monta Ellis (11) attempts a free throw during the third quarter against the Houston Rockets at Toyota Center. The Rockets defeated the Mavericks 99-94. Mandatory Credit: Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports
Jack:
Oh no question, it’s Monta Ellis. I mean, he’s not quite on the All-Star tier, but man, it would be so much fun to watch Monta Ellis Have It All in an All-Star game.
Eric:
Mike Conley. I really like Mike Conley. You should all like Mike Conley. He would have been super okay with throwing lobs to all the dunkers in the West and that would have been fun. Damian Lillard too, but only one real answer is allowed here.
Wes:
Draymond Green. He would be the only guy taking the All-Star Game seriously and would be a joy to watch in that setting.
Zach:
Swaggy. Why? Because Swaggy.
Ian:
Dion Waiters. He’s obviously not even close to a worthy candidate, but every meaningless exhibition game that goes by where we can’t see Waiters play mini-games of 1-on-1 with opponents (like he did in the Rising Stars game last year versus Tim Hardaway Jr.) is a travesty.
Who will make the most memorable play during the game this year?
Jack:
I’m gonna go with John Wall. FLEX TO THE LEFT…
Jan 27, 2015; Los Angeles, CA, USA; Washington Wizards guard John Wall (2) brings the ball down court during the second quarter against the Los Angeles Lakers at Staples Center. Mandatory Credit: Robert Hanashiro-USA TODAY Sports
Eric:
Steph and/or Klay, when they make 20 threes in a row.
Wes:
John Wall.
Zach:
Russell Westbrook.
Ian:
Give me Kyrie. His handles, finishes at the rim, and ability to drop a shot in an opponent’s grill are all completely filthy. He might try and end someone’s career in this game.
Who wins?
Jack:
The West. Just way too much talent. Klay Thompson is like their 12th guy, it’s absurd.
Eric:
The West, with Anthony Davis as the MVP.
Wes:
Everyone is going to pick the West. Can I take the East with the spread?
Zach:
I think it’s hard to pick against the West.. Which is why I’m not going to. But, closer than us “experts” think.
Ian:
I’ll go with the East, and with Kyrie as the MVP. He’s got the perfect style of play for this game, and I expect him to show out.