#NBAVineRank: 25-21: Hey look, there are the Pacers
By Ian Levy
Welcome back to #NBAVineRank, our latest project here at The Friendly Bounce. We’ve ranked all 30 teams in terms of Vineability, and are counting them down as we kill time in the offseason. Last week we looked at the bottom five. Now it’s time to move on.
25 Indiana Pacers (4.375)
24 Dallas Mavericks (4.4375)
23 Denver Nuggets (4.6875)
21 Detroit Pistons (4.9375)
21 Memphis Grizzlies (4.9375)
Ah, there are the Pacers. How did they escape the bottom five? Is everyone just super pumped for some Jordan Hill Vines, or what?
Jack (@jackhaveitall): This is honestly absurd. The Pacers should be second-last. Monta is awesome, and he have it all, but he’s not reallly that Vineable. We have no idea what Paul George will be like as he comes back. The rest of the squad is fairly irrelevant. I don’t understand this. Jordan Hill? Ian Mahinmi? George Hill? Have any of them ever even been Vined?
Taylor (@TaylorBojangles): I think I gave the Pacers the benefit of the doubt because Myles Turner is one of my favorite rookies. Think we could see a fair share of sweet #BLOCKZZZ out of him, assuming he gets regular run. But yeah, otherwise there’s basically nothing here. Hopefully Paul George.
Wes (@wcgoldberg): Paul George back? Monta Ball meets PG13? Frank Vogel forcing himself out of his comfort zone to play a faster, more spaced out game? Hell yeah I’m watching that.
Donnie (@donniebuckets): With a faster style and PG returning, I think it was smart to keep them out of the bottom 5. And I agree with Taylor that Myles Turner is an underrated candidate for most Vineable rookie.
Zach (@ZachOliverNBA): Well, I think getting Paul George back is going to give them a pretty big lift. Plus, as Donnie mentioned, they’re going to play a bit faster, so we could get some more highlights. Plus, they did get Monta so he can have it all some. So, yeah, I think they could be fun.
Wesley (@wshareNBA): Myles Turner’s showing in Orlando earned him (and in turn, the Pacers) some bonus points with me. Plus PG13 (I hate that this is a thing) is back? I’m not as crazy about Monta or his entertainment value as most, but come on, these are no Nets.
Chris (@ChrisBarnewall): If the Hornets have to endure the bottom five due to their horrid offense then we have done a massive injustice by putting the Pacers above the bottom five.
So these ranking came out before the Mavs signed JaVale. How much does that signing boost their Vineability?
Jack: Somewhere between 100 and 1,000 percent depending on how much he plays. People forget because he really hasn’t played consistent minutes since Vine has been popular, but JaVale is easily a top five Vineable player in the league. If he gets out there enough, the Mavs could vault their way into the top 10 by the end of the season.
Taylor: Yeah, given their seeming lack of Vineability pre-JaVale, it obviously gives them a major boost. But is he going to play? Is he going to make the team? Has JaVale lost some of his Vineability having been gone for so long? So many JaVale-related questions that give me pause.
Wes: Mega points on the potential for comedy scale, and decent points for the potential to do anything cool–like a sick dunk or something. The problem is I don’t know how much he’s going to actually play.
Donnie: Not only does JaVale help with his own Vineability, but Rick Carlisle’s Vineability goes up tenfold. He’s going to lose his mind every time JaVale is on the floor. This gives a relatively unvineable team some potential.
Zach: It helps, but I still don’t think they’re going to be that vineable. They don’t have a ton there, even with the king of ridiculous and funny vines, Javale.
Wesley: It’s pretty huge. I cover the Sixers for Liberty Ballers on SB Nation, and despite only suiting up for Philly for six games this season, probably half of my vines are of JaVale putback slams, goaltending violations and hilarious post-ups. Vineability is subjective, and comedy definitely plays a massive role on the right team.
Chris: Not as much as you’d think. McGee hasn’t been an exciting player for a really long time.
What score did you give the Mavs at first, and what would you give them now?
Jack: I hit them with a 4.5 pre-JaVale signing, but now I think I’d have to give them an 8.
Taylor: I gave Dallas a 6, due in large part to my status as a shameless Dirk apologist. I’d keep it at 6, just because my initial 6 was clearly overshooting things a bit.
Wes: I had the Mavs at 4 points, now I’m at 5.5.
Donnie: I gave the Mavericks a 5, and would bump them up to a 6 now.
Zach: I hit em’ with a two before, and I’m probably only going to bump it up to like a three, maybe a four now.
Wesley: They were a 3 two weeks ago, and they’re probably in the 4-5 neighborhood now. JaVale definitely moves the needle majorly, but only so much comedic value can offset a Deron Williams-Zaza Pachulia pick-and-roll.
Chris: I think I put them somewhere in the 4-5 range. Now they’re in the 5-6 range.
Who’s the most Vineable player in this group? Well, besides JaVale.
Jack: You know, this is actually pretty tough. I really want to say Tony Allen, because I love Tony Allen, but he’s not really that Vineable. So I think I’ll go with Andre Drummond. That dude throws down some insane alley-oops.
Taylor: I can see mega-millionaire Reggie Jackson doing a lot of dumb, Vineable crap this year as an irrational confidence guy, but that’s no fun. As for guys that will give us some nifty Vine highlights, I’m kinda liking Emmanuel Mudiay, based pretty much entirely on his fun Summer League. Kenneth Faried is also good for some monster #DUNKZZZ. Denver’s underrated here, I think.
Wes: Stan Van Gundy! (Yeah, I cheated.) He had arguably the best vine of last season and you know, as long as those sensitive NBA cameras and microphones don’t shy away from his sideline, we are due for another great sound byte this year. It’s a virtual lock.
Donnie: Jusuf Nurkic. Surely not the most exciting player basketball-wise, but his stares and inevitable fight that is coming make him an easy choice.
Zach: Some good options, actually. I like Andre Drummond, and Tony Allen, but I think I have to go with Jusuf Nurkic. We saw how much he didn’t care about others last year, and I think he could do some ridiculous things this year again.
Wesley: I’ll go with Drummond here. He’ll have a full season of catching lobs from Jackson, with hopefully some newfound spacing thanks to Ilyasova at the four (which, by the way, is the least talked about impactful acquisition of the summer).
Chris: Kenneth Faried LIVES for the highlight. He wins this in a landslide.